If and Only If
by mamaXunicorn
Summary: what if Erik didn't kill buquet? would it change anything? based off 2004 movie. EC please R&R!
1. Chapter 1

**_Title: If and Only If _**

**_Summary: What if Erik did not kill Buquet during "Il Muto"? would there be a change in the events? EC _**

_**Author: Erik's Secret Admirer**_

_**Pairing: EC**_

_**A/N: Hi people! Im back with yet another story! I promised myself I wouldn't write this until I finished my other stories but I have immense writers block on all of them and had the need to write so I started this one! I hope you enjoy! Please Read and Review! **_

_**Disclaimer: I do not own POTO! Simple as that! **_

Chapter 1

"Did I not instruct that box five was to be kept empty!" A voice boomed out throughout the theatre in the middle of the Opera. Many people looked around to see where the voice was coming from but a few looked to Box five where it was being by occupied by none other then the Vicomte De Chagny. There was chatter on and behind the stage. Meg Giry cried from the side stage "He's here the phantom of the opera."

On the stage Christine looked directly at where the phantom was. "It's him." She affirmed. Carlotta, who was next to her, pointed her fan at her and snapped, "You're part is silent little toad." Then the phantom spoke something that only Christine could hear, "A toad Madame, perhaps it is you who is the toad." And if it were not for her current situation Christine would have chuckled at that comment. She looked back at where the phantom was and saw him disappearing through a door. Carlotta came back on stage, and instructed M. Reyer to start the music again. The orchestra started up again and Carlotta started singing once again,

"Serafimo away with this pretence you cannot speak but kiss me in my…" What came out of her mouth next was not music but a croak. The audience chuckled at the sound and Carlotta was obviously quite embarrassed but still she remained on the stage. The music started up again and she sang, "Poor fool he makes me laugh, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha…" and she started croaking but this time it would not stop and she started having a fit and ran off the stage and the curtain closed. Christine watched as Carlotta's maids took her away still in a fit. Before she knew it, she was being pulled out by monsieur Firmin and he was saying, "the role of the countess will be played by miss. Daae" the audience started applauding and M. Firmin pushed her back through the curtain and told her to go get dressed and Madame Giry took her to her dressing room to get into the countess's costume.

Up in the rafters above the Opera House stood the Phantom of the Opera, smirking as he watched his plan fold into action. Carlotta was now unable to sing putting Christine in the role of the countess, which is what they should have done in the first place. He heard the door open of where he came out of just a few minutes ago open and knew it was Joseph Buquet who had seen and followed him. He silently followed Buquet as he wandered the catwalks apparently looking for him. This man has been telling stories of him since he started the whole phantom thing and quite frankly it annoyed him to an extent. Most of them were not even true, the descriptions he gave…he was just trying to frighten the whole staff of the Opera, which on his part was good. Frightening them would get them to not disobey his orders and for a while everything went well. That is until M. Andre and M. Firmin came into management. Those two thought this all a joke and don't believe any of it. Well unfortunately that got him angry and let his threats come into action. Erik promised a disaster would occur if they didn't obey him and this was surely beyond their imagination losing their "Prima Donna". Truly he could not understand why they kept her, if they were afraid of losing a Prima Donna there was no need to worry, Christine was ten times the singer Carlotta could ever be. He knew this for a fact and planned to show it to the managers so they could get rid of Carlotta and quit ruining the innocent viewers of the Operas ears.

Buquet continued to look around for him and Erik had enough of his silly stories and if he lived and saw him he would surely tell everybody and the managers would be after him. He could not risk being found. Well if Buquet wanted to see him…Buquet would see him and it would be the last time he ever would. Erik crept up behind the man and Buquet turned around and gasped when he came face to face with him. Erik glared at him and Buquet cried out and started to run away from him and across the cat walk. He knew this was going to happen so he climbed a rope getting to another catwalk across from the one Buquet was on. Buquet saw him on the other catwalk and took a step toward the right, Erik did the same, the same with the left then Buquet made a run for it and Erik ran after him and when he got close enough produced a Punjab from his cloak and threw it around the man's neck. Buquet fell to wood and flipped over on his back and stared at Erik. Erik was tightening the noose around his neck, and watching the man as he lost air and was turning slightly purple. He seemed to lose all track of anything going on around him but then the image of Christine popped into his head. Christine's smiling face, and suddenly thought of what would happen to their already slightly damaged relationship if he finished on killing this man. He looked down at Buquet who was choking for air and he loosed the noose around the man's neck so he could at least breath and while the rope was still around his neck Erik pulled him close so they were face to face and he hissed, "You tell anyone of this and I promise I will not hesitate to kill you next time." And with that said he took the noose off of his neck and slipped it back into his cloak and turned and walked in the other direction leaving Buquet lying there on the catwalk shaking out of his skin.

The ballet of Act III of the Opera had finished and Christine had come on as the part of the countess while the role of Serafimo was played by one of the other girls in the chorus. The show went on with no more interruptions by the phantom or by croaking sopranos.

After the show Christine had the same rush of emotions she had after her first performance of Hannibal. She had not been on the stage in a long time, and although she was now officially Carlotta's understudy they didn't rehearse much with her only with Carlotta. Meg helped her with her lines and occasionally her angel, which she recently learned was the phantom and not an angel but a man, would help her but he has been quiet lately not really showing himself only in notes and of course at the Opera. Christine figured the only reason he showed up was to get Carlotta out and her in, which was very sweet of him to do so but he did it in the wrong way. She can understand though that that is the only way for him. She now understands why he calls himself the Opera Ghost and why he wouldn't confront the managers with his concerns about Carlotta and wanting Christine as the Prima Donna. She remembers his face, although she saw it only for a second she saw it and remembered every little detail and she was not afraid of it like he thought she was. What she was afraid of was his temper, one minute he was calm and the next he was yelling. He scolded her when he was just her angel and before she knew he was a man but he never got that angry with her and it scared her.

Christine was getting congratulated by everyone around her, by the dancers and the other actors and actresses, stage hands, the managers and even some of the audience members that had some relations with either the dancers or the other actors or the managers. After about ten minutes Christine was tired of all the attention for she was not used to it in such a long time. Madame Giry sensed this and took her hand and led her away from all the people. Once they were in a quiet and empty hallway Madame Giry let her walk the way to her dressing room by herself for privacy but somehow Raoul had followed them.

"Christine!" Raoul called, running her way. Christine turned around and saw Raoul approaching and she smiled sweetly at him. "Good evening Raoul" she greeted him. He nodded and stopped in front of her. "Good evening to you too, oh Christine you were resplendent!" She blushed slightly at the compliment. "Why thank you Raoul but it is my job as Carlotta's understudy."

"Yes! And you should be proud of that too as I have heard Carlotta has never had an understudy in all her years working here and you were good enough to earn that position!" Raoul exclaimed happily. She smiled softly and shrugged. "Yes but I am not good enough to take her place."

"Nonsense you are better than her or at least in my opinion! The managers just don't like change and won't accept you, but I will talk to them and persuade them to get you into Prima Donna and plus now that croaking accident Carlotta will not likely be singing for a while."

She smiled up at him, "Thank you Raoul. I would appreciate that." He nods. "It would be my pleasure Christine, now I was hoping that you would accompany me to dinner. You surely are hungry."

"Well I ate a little before the show so im not that hungry and plus I am tired from the show. I hope you don't mind but I would just like to get dressed and retire to bed early." She said, her voice showing that she was sorry for declining his offer. Raoul showed apparent disappointment but nodded and smiled slightly, "yes I understand. You have had a big night with the phantom and all. Good night Christine." He leaned forward and gently placed a kiss on her cheek and nodded at her and turned around and heard Christine saying good bye to him as he left. Christine turned and headed back to her dressing room. She traveled down a few empty big hallways until she reached her dressing room. She turned the handle and opened the door and the room was pitch black and she went over and lit a few candles and as soon as the room lit up she saw a rose with a black ribbon tied around it on her bureau. She slowly approached it and sat down in the chair and took the rose in her small hands running her fingers over the silk of the black ribbon. She noticed that as always he cut off the thorns so they wouldn't prick of her. He does the littlest things just to keep her out of harm, which makes her think that he's so much more then a terrifying phantom. Despite what she knew and what he thought he was, he would always be an angel to her. She looked to the mirror attached to her wall and remembered that he led her through that mirror the first time she saw him and wondered now if he was behind there. She stood up holding the rose close to her heart and walked slowly toward the mirror. She placed her hand on the cold smooth glass and stood there for a minute before she felt a sudden warmth and saw the outline of a bigger hand surrounding hers and knew her angel was there behind the mirror. She smiled slightly and just really wanted to hear his voice so she called out for him. "Angel?" she questioned softly, it came out softer then she expected it to so she called out again. "Angel" she gets no response and she sighs. She knows he is there she can sense it but he doesn't want to show himself or even talk to her. She stands there a few more moments just staring at the mirror waiting and waiting for a response but none came. She was growing more tired by the second and was frustrated that he was not answering her. She sighed and started to turn getting tired of waiting for him to answer when she heard, "what is it you want, Christine." She stops suddenly hearing her angel's voice she turns back towards the mirror and although he still cannot be seen she knows he is there. She smiles and says, "Angel. I was wondering when you were going to respond." He was silent after that remark from her and it made her wonder if he was still even there. To make sure she called out again, "angel?"

"I'm here," He reassured

"How was I tonight?" she asked deciding to change the subject.

The tone of his voice suddenly changed, "Christine you were wonderful! Just like your debut in Hannibal now if only my managers would see or hear what's in front of their two eyes they might be a lot happier around here."

Christine chuckled. "Yes that is true they do seem to like Carlotta for some apparent reason."

"a reason that is far beyond me. Truly I do not understand why they keep her when they have you."

"Thank you." she whispers although she heard compliments from him it still made her feel quite embarrassed.

"I was only stating the obvious my dear, but you are welcome."

Christine was getting tired of just talking to a voice. Now that she knew he was a man and not an angel she would like to see him. Not that hearing his voice upset her in anyway, no hearing his voice comforted her in many ways. But she also wanted to see him in person.

"Angel" she asked the mirror.

"Yes?" he replied.

"Will you show Your self?" she asked hesitantly looking at the mirror and stared at it and got no answer. "Please."

"Why?" His voice was cold again, and she knew that what she asked upset him but she wanted to see him.

"I want to see you. Please." Her voice was soft and quiet as she looked at the mirror pleadingly hoping he would give in so she could see him. An awkward silence suddenly filled the room while Christine just stood staring at the mirror and her angel stood behind it staring back at her. Christine sighed suddenly realizing her defeat in trying to get him to show himself and turned to get dressed into her nightgown when she suddenly heard the mirror opening behind her.

_**A/N: I know I'm mean for leaving you at a cliffy in the first chapter but I really have no idea what to write and need to think about it but I will update as soon as possible so please tell me what you think of it so far! **_


	2. Chapter 2

_**A/N: ok this chapter is a little short but I hope you still enjoy it! Please R & R! **_

Chapter 2:

_Christine sighed suddenly realizing her defeat in trying to get him to show himself and turned to get dressed into her nightgown when she suddenly heard the mirror opening behind her. _

She turned around hopefully, and saw that the mirror was infact opening slowly. She waited in anticipation as the mirror continued to open until it was finally open enough so he could fit through and he came into view and stepped through the mirror. A smile was forming on her lips as he stepped into her dressing room. He stood right in front of the mirror, not daring to come closer and stood staring at her. She stared back at him taking in what he looked like; the glow of the candle reflected off his white mask and illuminated his facial features. The candlelight also reflected off his eyes which she didn't notice until now was a bluish greenish color. He stood tall and firm, and if she didn't know any better she would have said he was a statue of some sort. An awkward silence fell upon the two and for what seemed like hours the two just stared at each other. Christine stared at the man in front of her and found herself speechless she didn't know what to say. She has grown comfortable around him and could tell him anything when he was her angel; he was her greatest friend besides Meg of course. But when Meg couldn't help or she didn't want to tell Meg, her angel was always there and he would always be there she knew that for sure. "Angel." She finally managed to whisper. His eyes closed and she heard an intake of his breath. She felt she was too far away and took a step closer and as she grew closer she noticed that he was breathing rather heavily. She reached out her hand slowly and gently placed it on his cheek. As soon as her hand touched his skin his eyes snapped open and they were looking into hers. She smiled gently at him and she felt him tensen up. She guessed that the closeness was making uncomfortable. She didn't want to make him uncomfortable so she took a step back still keeping her gaze locked with his.

"It was you wasn't it?" she asked breaking the silence.

"What was me?" he asked.

"You made Carlotta croak?"

"I had to get her off somehow." He replied with a slight smirk. "It's just temporary her voice is not ruined forever. Unfortunately."

"It wasn't ruined before?" she replied looking up at him. He smirked again surprised that Christine would say something like that. "Touché."

"You also showed your self. Weren't you afraid someone would follow you?"

He shrugged. "I doubt anyone would. I can hide myself pretty well and also travel pretty quickly." He replied although knowing that someone did follow him and he almost killed him. But lucky for him and Buquet his love for Christine is stronger then anything else and it over powered his feeling for murder. But he made it perfectly clear to Buquet that if he told anyone he would face the consequences.

"But what if they did find you?" she asked in concern looking up at him. "You risked your self just to get me in the part of the countess."

"Christine you should know that I would do anything for you. And they didn't find me there isn't anything to worry about." _Wait…worry? She's worried about me? _ He thought to himself and a flicker of hope arose in his heart.

"But if they did…they would have killed you automatically." She looked down to the floor not wanting to think about if he was not in her life any longer. She lost her father she didn't want to lose him now.

"Christine they didn't that's all that matters. Please stop concerning your self over it." _I'm not worth it. _

Christine nodded and looked back up at him and said in all seriousness, "Just promise me you won't do something like that again."

"Do what?"

"Don't risk your self like that again."

He looked at her trying to read her. Her face showed concern and her eyes were pleading. She really didn't want him to show himself. _But that's the only way the managers will listen to me._ He felt like arguing that with her, but after the last time he didn't want to get in a fight with her. The letters didn't work the managers just thought it was some kind of joke played by perhaps one of the chorus girls or the maids. But perhaps the little announcement he made during the Opera will prove to them that he's real. Christine certainly knew it was him but Carlotta seemed doubtful even after her little croaking incident. Although he did notice the Vicomte fidgeting and occasionally looking around the theatre, that amused him. The vicomte although he acted like he didn't believe in him Erik had a feeling he did and was afraid of him. And that's what he wants to give off, to everyone but of course Christine. He wants everyone to be afraid of him so they would listen but so far he has only succeeded once and that was with the vicomte. _Hmm…perhaps if I talk to him personally but not showing myself, and threaten him to leave Christine alone he will listen. _He would do anything to get Christine away from Raoul, when he saw him in the same room with her he got jealous and Erik did not like the feeling of being jealous. So he had to get rid of the vicomte and perhaps that plan would work. He felt confident in that plan, because of seeing what he saw in the theatre today. The threat was directed toward him because he was in Erik's box. He knew one day the managers would get fed up with the letters and him telling them that it was his box and one of them, most likely M. Andre, would say, 'his box? It doesn't have his name on it! It doesn't have it in our records that he bought the box! And therefore the box does not belong to him!' well sure that is true but having it on the box door "this box is reserved for the Opera Ghost." No, no that will not do. And the opera ghost buying the box well that's just absurd!

He suddenly got snapped back into reality and turned his attention back to Christine who was still looking at him in the same way. He sighs and nods. "I will try."

"bu.." she tries to protest but he cuts her off. "Christine, I can not promise you that I will do that because it is the only way that they will listen to me. I've lived in this Opera House for almost all my life, I know all the secret passageways that stage hands don't even know exist! If anyone finds me its me who approaches them. There is only one exception though. Joseph Buquet. That man has been here for as long as I can remember he knows about almost all of the passageways and doors but not all of them. And in all my years he has only seen me once," _Twice if you count what just happened a few hours ago. _"And I was distracted that day but as soon as I sensed him looking upon me I scattered and I heard him saying that he couldn't see much of me and the part that he did see was a lie. Have you ever heard his stories?"

Christine nodded.

"They're not true are they?"

Christine shook her head, "oh no not at all! They are so stupid now that I know what you look like."

He became curious as she said this, "oh? And what do I look like?"

"Not like any of Buquet's stories." Then she laughed a little. "in Buquet's stories he makes you seem like a monster."

His face lit up at that little comment. Only Buquet's stories made him seem like a monster. She didn't think he was a monster like most people did. This confused him but also made him hopeful. Christine noticed that her comment made him seem to pep up. she hadn't noticed before but his shoulders were a little slumped and now they were back all the way and his eyes sparkled a bit. "D…Did you think you were a monster?" she asked and at that sudden moment remembering what he was telling her that day in his lair. 'Stranger than you dreamt it can you even dare to look or bare to think of me. This loathsome gargoyle who burns in hell but secretly, secretly, yearns for heaven secretly.' "Oh angel you did. You do." He turned his head away and looked to the ground. Christine stepped closer to him. "Why?" she asked quietly. He responded not looking up, "you've seen my face…you should know why."

"Oh angel." She placed her hand on his cheek and put her other hand under his chin and made him look at her. "Listen now. I do not think of you any differently. You are a person you are a man you just look different, and that does not matter to me. Other people may think what they want but you are no monster." Erik stared into her eyes, trying to dig into her soul to get the full truth and as he just stood there staring; he realized that she was pouring her soul into her words and everything she just said was the truth. She does not cease to amaze him, every day he falls in love with her all over again. For a long time he was fearing the day that he would finally tell her, fearing that she wouldn't understand and fearing that she would run as soon as she saw him; the real him. That's why he hesitated, and it last for almost 10 years the angel business. Until her big debut in Hannibal which is when he decided he would present himself to her. He turned his thoughts back to Christine and noticed that she had gotten closer to him. He watched her his heart beating fast. _What is she doing? _He wondered. She had a slight smile on his face, he couldn't tell if it was a smirk or not. And still she continued to step nearer to him and he continued to wonder. She stopped only a few inches away from his face and stared into his eyes and he just stood there clueless. Christine lifted her self on up to her toes and continued to stare Erik in the eyes and started to inch closer to him when they suddenly got interrupted by a knock on the door. Christine fell back on her feet and turned her head toward the door but still remained close to Erik.

"Christine?" Madame Giry's voice came through the door. "Christine are you in there?"

Christine sighed in relief, for a minute she thought it was Raoul and Raoul would have insisted to come in and would have. "Yes Madame. Ill be there in a minute." And as she turned her head back to Erik, he did what she was intentionally going to do first. It took her by surprise at first but then she closed her eyes and gave in to the kiss. It was short and sweet. Christine looked at him who was staring at back at her and then he started to turn. She took his arm and turned him back around and kissed him back. As she did though she was moving back towards the mirror and when he was right in front of the mirror she released him and pushed him back into the mirror. "Go we must not let her see you." she whispered to him and kissed him quickly and shoved the mirror back into place. Before she answered the door she turned back to the mirror and smiled at it.

_**A/N: I know this is short but I had trouble with it and im leaving for Disney tmmrw for 10 days and I didn't want to have you wait that long…so im sure you would rather have liked this am I right? **_

_**Ok so a little E/C action there I know it was a little early but there will be troubles for the two soon enough! Ok so review and as soon as I get back from Florida I'll continue to write for you! **_


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